MIL- (Mother-in-law)
How To get along with my Mother-in-law
Please realize this post has been written from my experience. I believe the world has put a hopeless and negative perspective on Mother-in-law relationships of which we to often except without opposition . I have talked to many of my friends who have faces similar Mother-in-law relationship problems. Some have slowly figured them out by applying similar concepts as I’m about to address, while others have either give up or have no desire to even try. I personally believe we, as children of God, are challenged to at least try to get along with our Mother-in-law. If not for anything, we should try for the peace of our own homes. No grand baby should be in the middle of a mom and grandma hate club, and no husband should be pulled between the devotion of his mom and wife. Let us rise up today …
Proverbs 31
12.She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
26. She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
28.Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
29.Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
30.Favour is deceitful, and beauty isvain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
31.Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.
Let us apply
Can your character within your Mother-in-law relationship be spoken of as above?
Why are our Mother-in-laws, or even other family members the “exception” to the Godly principles we have been taught all of our life? I have yet to find the exception allowed within God’s word.
If we could stop and apply some Godly principles to our Mother-in-law relationships we may find that we indeed CAN get along with our Mother-in-law.
Follow peace with all men without which no man shall see God…
Disclaimer: I realize every situation is different and has it’s own obstacles. If you have done your part to get along with your Mother-in-law, and your mother/ daughter-in-law relationship is still rough, don’t feel discouraged. Keep up the good work and continue to trust God:
Lessons I’ve learned on how to get along with my Mother-in-law
My mother-in-law has taught me a LOT!If there is one thing I could tell a young newly-wed wife it would be , “try to learn to get along with your mother in law”.
Notice I said “learn”, it’s not always easy and sometimes it is indeed a learning process. You may have to learn a few things about each other but if you willing to learn and forgive you are already a step in the right direction!
I can honestly say, after almost 10 years of being married into the family, and many struggles, my Mother-in-law (AkA ‘Mama’) is very dear to my heart. Like anybody we have had our ups and downs, and no SHE has not always been the “down” side, more times then not I was!
If I could have learned and accepted a few of the principles I’m about to share from the beginning, I believe things could have been a tad bit smoother for both of us starting out.
I do not wish to change the past, I just want to work on the future. And to encourage others who may face similar obstacles while trying to get along with their Mother-in-law.
-Things I wish I had known-
- Never fear that your mother-in-law will “replace your mom”. She cant, she won’t, and most likely she doesn’t even want to. With that being said, in many cases, she can still be like a 2nd mom to you if you let her.
- Don’t expect your mother-in-law to act just like your mother or to have the same suggestion’s, advice, reactions and characteristics. Unfulfilled expectations have killed many relationships of all types .
- Just because your mother in law is different then your mom, doesn’t mean she’s always wrong. Respect her and consider what she has to say no matter if you agree or not. You might even learn something now and again! I know I have!
- Remember your mother-in-law probably loves you as much as her own child (mine sure does!). Love is a choice and if you will choice to love her back, with God’s help, you can both learn to deal with your differences much easier. (Love covers a multitude of sins … ) with love, getting along with your Mother-in-law becomes a lot easier.
- Learn to except and respect your differences instead of despising or criticizing them. When you met & married your husband you excepted many of his different ways without batting a eye, I’m sure you can put up with a few from your mother-in-law too if you would but try .
- Lastly, don’t take your mother-in-law for granted. Recognize how much she loves you. Show her respect (she did mother your husband after all). Show gratefulness when she helps you out. And most of all give grace when needed, for none of us are perfect, not her and not even you. If you can apply these three things daily.. love, respect, and gratitude I believe you can see a difference in the process of getting along with your Mother-in-law.
Let us reconsider
If your relationship with your Mother- in-law seems strained, know that God put her in your life for a reason – try to reconsider your differences recognize the blessings. Ask yourself occasionally how you can be a blessing to her.. you never know, she might be facing some mind battles about you too, such as “I want her to know I love her. I’m just trying to except her. Does she love me? She does not respect my advise.
No, I don’t have all of the answers to troubled mother-in-law relationships that the world has seemed to put acceptance on. But I do know it does not have to be that way in every single case. In particularly when both parties are children of God, (especially then). Often times we can do so much more to strengthen a relationship if we would take time to notice our own flaws and stop pointing out the downfalls of others.Stop saying “I can’t get along with my Mother-in-law” and do something about it. The best place to begin is within the walls of our own hearts.
Find something in common and begin building
Me and my Mother-in-law are as different as night and day, we even have topics I have learned to avoid lol but even with that, we have still been able to find some things in common over the past 9 yrs.
It’s with those things, our family, and most of all our God that we continue to build our relationship on, for without Him we can do nothing. I challenge you to do the same.
Acknowledgments
I have published this post with approval from my Mother-in-law. I do want to take a moment and thank her for who she is and for her love and support.
Dear Mama,
Thank you raising an amazing son, loving me like your own, and for the wonderful Nana you are to mine & Mark’s children. You are the best mother-in-law God could have given me. Most of all, thank you for your commitment to Christ. Being His faithful child is what makes you who you are. Don’t ever stop living the example!
Your daughter (in-law), Erica
Don’t forget to subscribe in the subscription form below to receive post notifications and free printables! Be sure to confirm in your email to finish the process.
One thought on “How to get along with my Mother-in-law”