Are you killing your husband with words?

Are you killing your husband?

You probably haven’t been asked that before! Count me as dramatic but in all honesty, I believe, we as wives have a lot more power than we realize in our homes, especially with our words.

Death and life are in the power of the tongue: proverbs 18:21 KJV

Today I want to leave you with a few questions and a bible story to ponder on…

As I was listening to the story of Haman the other day it really hit me how the ungodly advice of his own wife resulted in his death. I then asked myself, how many times have my words brought death to my husband? Not literal death but nevertheless death if some sort. Let’s rehearse the story of Haman first before I expound.

“Then said Zeresh his wife and all his friends unto him, Let a gallows be made of fifty cubits high, and to morrow speak thou unto the king that Mordecai may be hanged thereon: then go thou in merrily with the king unto the banquet. And the thing pleased Haman; and he caused the gallows to be made.”

Easter 5:14 KJV

Two chapters later…

“So they hanged Haman on the gallows that he had prepared for Mordecai. Then was the king’s wrath pacified”.

Easter 7:10 KJV

I would imagine that Haman’s wife was probably a great cook, she may have even done her wifely duties to a T. Who knows, the town may have looked on her as a great wife to Haman. The fact that her husband so readily took her evil advice makes me think she may have had her outward duties down pat. It wasn’t her neglect that killed her husband it was her tongue. The advice she gave her man, litterly killed him.

I do realize that a Godly man would have never listened to such evil advice as Haman’s wife gave, but still yet, there is a lesson to be learned here. This story shows us just how dangerous our unwise words can be to our home and husbands.

What exactly have you been saying to you husband?

• Have you been killing your husbands spirit with words of discouragement or are your words uplifting and encouraging?

• Have you been killing your husbands choices with words of scorn and criticism or have your words (and even actions) been supportive to him?

• Have you been killing your husband with words of doubt or do your words show him trust and relay peace?

These are just a few questions to ask yourself. I’m sure you get the idea here…

“Talk no more so exceeding proudly; let [not] arrogancy come out of your mouth: for the LORD [is] a God of knowledge, and by him actions are weighed.”

1Samuel 2:3 KJV

Arrogance transplanted as :

ʻâthâq, aw-thawk’; impudent:(not showingk due respect) arrogant, grievous (hard) things, stiff


There are so many types of words and tones that we use everyday. Let’s make sure our words pass the standards of God’s word before we speak them!

For as much as negative words can cut down, positive words can build strengthen . I want to build up my home, my family, and my husband with my words. God forbid we ever tare down the most precious people in our lives with thoughtless words.

And most of all, I want to obey the commandment of God and keep my tongue from evil!


Keep thy tongue from evil, and thy lips from speaking guile.

Psalm 34:13 KJV

Happy Homemaking!

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Valentine gift ideas for husband that doesn’t want anything!

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Do you need gift ideas for a husband that doesn’t want anything?! Well, we are in the same boat, my friend, and not just at Valentine’s Day either. You should see my husband’s Christmas list, it is a true surprise to him what he receives each year. 😂

Today, I’m going to give you a list of gift ideas for a husband that doesn’t want anything for Valentine’s Day!

Hopefully you will find at least a couple of these ideas useful (Hopefully more!). I like to make note of areas of enjoyment in my husband’s life and find gifts that will accommodate those loves. Most of these ideas are extremely adaptable and should be able to adjust to your husband’s enjoyment. That’s what makes them work best for the husband that don’t want anything!

So let’s get onto the gift ideas!

  • A dreaded chore completed for him
  • Favorite home cooked meal or dessert
  • A date planned doing his favorite hobby
  • Accessories for his hobby
  • Gift card to a favorite restaurant
  • Gift basket made of seemingly insignificant favorites such as favorite snacks etc. (Alone each may seem tacky but put together, would make a nice gift)
  • Inside joke gift
  • Subscription of some sort
  • Tickets to a nearby museum or event that he would enjoy
  • Personalized gift (Etsy or DIY)
  • Trip to somewhere he loves
  • Romantic scavenger hunt
  • Something useful but liked (new wallet, favorite brand of jeans etc)
  • A upgrade to a already owned item (new phone, laptop, electric razor etc)
  • Photo gift
  • Memory gift that re-lives the entirety of the past year or the entirety of your relationship together

I hope this list of ideas has triggered a gift idea for you to give to your husband this year that he will love! If you enjoy post like this and content on Godly homemaking, then please subscribe via subscription form below. PS- As a subscribed homemaker, you will also have access to this adorable car date printable (shown bleow) and MORE FREE PRINTABLE’S on my “Homemakers Only” page!

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The Greatest Advice I Received In 2022!

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The greatest advice I received in 2022 would have to be from a dear pastor’s wife in  Kilgore, TX.  Two words she told me have stuck all year and I hope for the rest of my life, for I have found that these two words can be life changing when applied! 

So what are these two words? The greatest advice I received in “2022?

They are to… BE INTENTIONAL! 

I have tried to apply this advise this past year and continue to do so with great benefits! 

I have found, in my own life, that when I am not intentional with the things that matter the most, they will often go overlooked, unappreciated, and sometimes, sadly  forgotten. 

God has given us so many things to find joy in within our everyday lives, yet the joy is often lost amidst our busy,  21st century pace. It may seem impossible to stop this fast train of time, but I do believe, being intentional can bring back some of the joy we are continually missing out on. Keep reading for the three main areas I have incorporated the greatest advice I received in 2022 into my life!

Three areas I have benefited by applying the greatest advice I received in 2022

1. Being intentional with my children

2. Being intentional in my marriage

3. Being intentional with my extended family

Being intentional with our children

First, let’s add “the greatest advice I received” to the lives of our children.

I’d say most of us, as moms, spend a lot of time with our children. We feed them, school them, dress them, correct them, and the list goes on. I often find myself so caught up in the obvious “needs” of my child that I forget the “hidden needs”.  

I must intentionally remember that my children are not just “kids” that I am trying to keep alive until they can fend for themselves. But instead, they are tiny humans, growing into adults, created by God and in the image of God, whom I have been given the great responsibility to teach and train according the Word Of God. If that’s the case, which it is, then raising my children consist of a lot more than physical daily cares! I must show them the love of God by spending time with them, set the example of Godly character in my daily actions , talk to them, listen to them, answer their questions, be in communion with them, learn them, know their character, guide them, teach them the Bible, create a Godly atmosphere in our home, nourish them, protect them, and win their heart. I want to make sure I am doing my part and if it takes some intentionality to do it, then I want to be intentional! 

Proverbs 23:26 My son, give me thine heart, And let thine eyes observe my ways.

Applying the greatest advice I received in 2022 to my marriage

The second area I want to talk about being intentional in is in our marriage. I wanted to write about this one first because I personally believe the order of a wife’s responsibility is first to God, her husband, her children, her home, then other added responsibilities.   Some may disagree with this order but that’s ok 😜. It’s where I stand.   God specifically made Eve as Adam’s helpmeet before she was anything else. Later, the kids came along.  And although we seem to all know NOT to neglect the daily needs of our child, it’s a shame that we sometimes forget the needs of our husband once the children are tended too, and this is exactly why I decided to talk about marriage AFTER we discussed the children. 

If you find yourself pushing your husband or marriage to the back burner I challenge you to be intentional this year and take back your marriage!  We all know about the “honeymoon stage” but sometimes we take for granted that after the honeymoon stage, kids, and a few years, our marriages grow stale. It does not have to be this way! Marriage should be a continuous growing relationship. But the fact is, if you stop working on anything, you will stop seeing results. 

I have seen so many people who seem to stop construction on their marriage, they put it on “pause” while the kids are raised and public jobs are thriving. They have plans to return to the “marriage project” once things settle down in life. Sadly, that’s not how it works, when they get back their marriage, years later, they hardly know the person they once married. The crumbling marriage is barely holding together and it will take a miracle to repair. Sadly, some don’t feel it’s worth it and instead of allowing God to help them rebuild their marriage they take the bulldozer to it leaving confused Children and family and hurting themselves. What happened? They simply stopped working.  

The last area I want to be intentional in is with our family outside of the home (also known as extended family.)

Being intentional with our extended family 

It’s so easy, (especially if you live far away like me) to get caught up with “your 4 and no more”. I have found that I must be very intentional in my relationships outside of our home. Sometimes, it’s easy to think my family is busy doing their own thing or that they will call when they can etc. But you must realize that they may be thinking the same thing! If you are not regularly talking to your family members, then it’s time to change the game plan and become intentional!  Start out small and realize that your relationship may look different than someone else’s. Some people talk to their parent, grandparent, grown sibling, or best friend, every single day. Others just can’t, and that’s ok. Figure out what works for both of you and do it but realize it may take some sacrifice and it may take some intentionality. Intentionally making our relationships stronger is always worth it. 

Ways I have found to be intentional and apply the greatest advice I received in 2022


With my kids

  • Listening to the dramatized Gideon bible app together. 
  • Reading books
  • Playing together
  • Talking to them about their day 
  • Looking for opportunities to discuss eternity and spiritual matters

In my marriage 

  • The good morning kiss! 
  • Kiss good morning, every morning. (This is easy to forget when your husband is full time at home. We made a point to be intentional with this last year. We didn’t want to lose this simple habit that gives us a connecting point first thing in the morning.) 
  • Cuddling before bedtime 
  • Never underestimate the closeness of closeness. 
  • Complimenting each other
  • Yes, they know what you think about them but just like you, they like to be reminded. 
  • Talk! 
  • Make sure you still communicate! Lack of communication can lead to misunderstanding, hurtfulness, confusion, and distance between two people. Talk about anything and everything to your spouse The habit of communication goes a long way. 
  • Laugh together 
  • Don’t get so stuck in the day to day grind to the point that you forget to smile and laugh together. There’s always something to laugh about in life if you look for it. 

With my extended family 

(For family living close bye)

Have them over for dinner just because 

Plan a family get together or family picnic  one weekend 

Don’t forget to visit occasionally! (The first year my husband and I were married, we hardly stepped foot in his parent’s house. They eventually called us wanting to know why we never came to see them, we had a simple enough answer; “because you never invited us. We thought you all were busy.” Boy, did we hear it then lol… come to find out they thought we’d come over when we wanted, therefore, they thought we didn’t wanna come over and we thought they were too busy for us. Yikes!  Point? Don’t do above lol .)

When life gets busy, pick up the phone. A phone call can be nice even when you live down the road.

(For Family Far Away)
  • Call! 
  • Make habit of regular phone calls or face time where you can actually hear each others voices and possibly see each others faces.  This is the most personable way to communicate long distance, so don’t miss out on it. 
  • Text (In between calls, use texting and such to keep up. Just make sure this does not take place of phone calls. Setting up group family text can be fun too. This is also a great way to update family on life changes  that are not necessary emergencies. A  quick update can really be appreciated by all the long distance family. Don’t assume that they don’t want to be bothered by these things just because they can’t be there. They do, they want to feel a part even when you are far away.) 
  • Share photos often (Every time I talked to my Mamaw, she told me how much she loved seeing the new photos of my kids every few days. She said it was so much better then when I was a child living 10 hrs away, she felt like she was literally watching my kids grow up with the technology of phone photography.
  • Don’t forget holidays and special occasions (Set reminders on your phone, mark your calendar, mail birthday cards, send text, mail gifts, whatever you got to do but don’t forget your family’s special days! Birthdays, anniversaries, even Happy 4th of July! If you’re not there, they miss you and it helps so much to know you are thinking about them. It’s so easy to forget these special days when you’re not living near your family, but remembering them on these days is worth it!)

Lastly, Don’t let your kids forget!

Forget what? Forget your family! It may sounds silly but it’s really important, especially for small children. They need constant reminders and conversations about your family when living far away. This will build a knowledge in their young minds for who their family members are and prepare them to connect when you see them. They will connect quicker, feel a special bond when you have taken time to nourish this long distance relationship. And to top it off, it will make your relatives feel like a million bucks when little Susie knows who they are! 

I was raised across the country from my grandparents. Likewise, my children are experiencing a similar situation. I have always been close to my grandparents and my kids are the same way. My two year old knew exactly who his grandparents were even after being gone for 4 months. Without realizing it, I had parents who were intentional in this area  and I am trying my best to do the same. Being intentional works! 

If you want a list of some ways that we don’t let our kids forget who their “far away” family are, then SUBSCRIBE directly below and you can get a copy under my subscribed homemakers page! Don’t forget to CONFIRM in your email or you subscription will nit be complete!

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